Soulmate
by ksjf2012
Summary: He became my ultimate protector. He sat with me, holding my wound while we silently cried and listened to the gun shots and the screams and the sirens outside and around our school. I don't want to assume were soul mates now, but I was always going to have a place in my heart, and my head and my soul for Kendall Knight.
1. Chapter 1

His hand was cold on my knee. I swear…the one day I decide to dress like a girl and wear a cute dress, it comes back to bite me in the ass. Normally I would be self-conscious with a guy this cute, this close to my body. I'm awkward and I hate my skinny legs. I usually don't have guys look at me so when this one…especially this one is okay with being so close to me, it makes me feel a little better. Like maybe the past three years have been an absolute lie. Maybe I am pretty and worthy of someone to love me. Then again…the circumstance is the only reason the star football player is holding around me, clutching onto me for dear life. If it was any other day, he wouldn't even glance my way. I'm not saying I am grateful for our circumstance of being so close because I'm not. I wish this wasn't happening. I wish I wasn't crying, and feeling any kind of pain. I wish I had come to the first day of school without it being ruined by something so…horrific. I wish I had decided to go eat lunch with my friends instead of going to the library to check out my books. I was a nerd like that and I liked to be ahead of everyone so I didn't feel lost, or stupid. Unfortunately my urgency for knowledge and getting my senior year over with was my ultimate downfall.

I looked around us, at the empty library hoping, praying and wishing someone would come in and make everything better. The whole place was darkened by the librarian who shut off the lights ordered some students to close the blinds and get down, right before she walked out telling us to stay put. I didn't think anyone knew I had been hit. Everyone heard the gun shots and everyone started screaming but my scream was silenced by the horrible pain I felt in my hip. I fell against a book case and grabbed onto my bloody side, but I could do nothing else. I couldn't yell out for help because I heard someone yelling. A kid, it sounded like and all he kept saying was for everyone to shut up and stay down or he would kill them. I started crying then, I think. When I heard the voice of the person who shot me. That's when it hit me I guess. Or maybe the whole situation hit me when someone else came around the corner of the bookcase and spotted me. We locked eyes for a whole minute before he hurried to me, fell to his knees beside my bloody side and replaced my hand with his. The first thing he said to me was that I was going to be okay and he would get me help. I believed him, mostly because it was the first time I had ever had the ultimate pleasure of hearing him talk. Directly to me. I've had a crush on this guy since 7th grade and never had the courage to talk to him because like I said. He's the star quarterback for our football team, with gorgeous blonde hair, and he drives a Benz. I'm a nerdy short girl who wears glasses and drives her dads old beat up Ford Pickup truck. We never had any reason to talk. But today, was changing that.

I shamelessly let my body curl into his as he pressed onto my wound and held around me with his other arm. I clutched onto the black hoodie hanging on his body. He didn't mind that I laid my head in the crook of his neck or that I was getting my blood and tears all over him. He just held onto me as I silently cried and tried to keep myself awake. That's the one thing I ever took form scary movies or action movies. Keep pressure on the wound so the person doesn't lose too much blood. And to make sure the person stays awake. I wanted to ask him to make sure I did stay awake but my voice was lost by the slamming of a door. I jumped probably ten feet in the air pushing harder into his body. The hand that was resting on my knee moved up to my head and he pulled me closer to his body resting his chin on my head. I heard running by maybe two or three people but closed my eyes, not getting my hopes up that it was someone to come help us. "Did he come up to you?" I opened my eyes slowly hearing his voice and raised my head turning to look at him. His hand not holding my wound softly wiped at my face, getting the tears off. "The kid who has the gun. Did he do it close up?" I bowed my head down and shook it softly. He again pulled me into him, neither of us saying anything about me now sitting directly on his lap. I was feeling more and more drowsy and knew if I didn't get any help anytime soon, I could possibly die. "I need to get you outside. I need to get you to some paramedics." His voice was low and sounded so hurt. "I'm going to try to stand and pick you up alright, but I don't want to be seen so just…tell me if I'm hurting you okay?" I could only nod, and tense up as he started to move around and push off the bookcase. Except we barely moved because we heard movement form a row down. He sat back against the bookcase and held onto me tight trying to shield me as best as he could. But it wasn't needed. At least that's how he reacted. When someone, a guy with short brown hair appeared crawling on hands and knees towards us he loosened his grip on me, but still held onto my wound. "Logan…are you alright?" The kid with short brown hair, Logan, I knew and even talked to on occasion even though he was a running back for the football team and Kendall's best friend. Logan was a freaking genius and he was in a lot of my advanced classes.

"Yeah…I wasn't hit. Is she alright? Are you alright Kendall?" I glanced up at Logan who was now kneeling in front of us gently pushing Kendall's hand off my side. I groaned quietly digging deeper into Kendall who pet through my curly brown hair.

"No she's not. She's bleeding bad and I need to get her out of here. I'm fine but I need to help her."

"Anna? How are you doing?" I was crying bad again and both boys took it as I wasn't doing good at all. "Okay…let's get her up. We need to find James and Carlos…they are in here somewhere. I heard more than one gunshot come in here." I'm not a very big person, weight or height wise, so I wasn't surprised that Kendall could stand while still holding me, without any struggle at all. Logan held onto my back for support but Kendall did all the work.

"Text James…he always has his phone on vibrate." As soon as he stood up straight I threw my arms around his neck and held onto him for dear life. Kendall slowly and quietly followed behind Logan who peered around a bookcase stopping at the corner. I raised my head slowly and glanced round the dark library seeing books and paper thrown around everywhere. When we turned the corner I guess Kendall hadn't noticed Logan had stopped because we ran right into him. "Logan…what?" Logan turned to us quick, the color drained form his face. He looked at Kendall and then at me before turning back around and blocking everything from me. "Oh my God…" I tried desperately to peer around Logan but Kendall quickly pushed my face into his neck and while holding around me with one hand, under my legs, his other hand kept my face pushed into his warm soft neck. "Go Logan…" We were walking again and a lot faster than before.

"I'm…I feel cold." It was the first time I had spoken since telling my friends I'd meet up with them at lunch after I got my books. It made Kendall stop walking and let my head go. I raised it and looked around seeing we were at the entrance of the library. Logan moved first and pulled out his phone reading fast. He looked up and around Kendall who was facing the doors, inches away from our freedom. "I'm…I'm weak."

"Logan…"

"Hold onto her side Kendall and keep your eyes open Anna. James and Carlos say they have a group of freshman that are scared so their coming with them." I held my head up and tightened around Kendall's neck looking out the doors.

"How…how many guys were shooting?" It was the first time we had even brought up the shooters. Logan glanced towards me and Kendall before sighing out and glancing out the doors. The hallway was bright as the day but I could see bags and books and food from kids who panicked hearing the multiple gun shots and dropped everything they had, just to get away. This wasn't the same school anymore. It never would be.

"I saw Will and Ben." Logan swallowed hard as he looked down and shook his head. "They each had like…four guns on them. Will saw me man…he looked me dead in the eyes. Right before he pulled the trigger. I mean he didn't even care where he was shooting. He just shot." Logan slowly raised his head and looked down at my side. I felt weaker by the second. "What would possess them to do something like this? Why…" He stopped quick hearing footsteps, making Kendall turn us. I clutched around him harder seeing five people walking towards us kind of crouching. James Diamond, who was also a running back for the football team, walked right up to us and stared down at my side, bleeding out still. "We need to get those guys and her out of here right now."

"We're not supposed to leave yet Logan. The police could think were the ones doing it and we have hostages or something." I heard a small gasp leave a frightened looking girls mouth as she clutched onto Carlos Garcia, who was also on the football team. All four guys, I had heard, have been friends forever. It was part of the reason the team did so well. These four were unstoppable. I don't know Carlos's position…actually I do. But my blood loss is making thinking harder. "Look…why don't we call someone…like…maybe one of our parents. They had to have heard about the shooting already and are probably here. Maybe we could get them to come in here and get us." The plan sounded solid, and neither Kendall or Logan disagreed. Except no one had time to pull out a phone and call for help. There was a loud echo of laughter from three different people, along with something get banged into the lockers as they ran down the hall. Everyone, in a split second ducked down and hid into the shadows. Logan pushed both Kendall and I to the bookcases and Kendall dived down behind one, holding the back of my head. I clutched tight around him squeezing my eyes shut feeling my side get smashed into by Kendall's body.

"Where is everyone?! Shouldn't you all be hurrying about your life going to class, and being the pretty and popular?!" I dug deeper into the warm body of my new protector who was petting through the back of my hair while holding me tight still. "Hey…let's check in here. I saw some football players." Now it was Kendall's turn to tense up and gasp quietly. When I heard the library door open I raised my head looked towards the end of the row of bookcases to where I was going to be seeing the same kids, at least one of them, that shot me.

"No man…stop trying to find victims. Whoever gets in our way we kill." Kendall pulled my head back down on his shoulder and I accidently let out a small cry. The whole library went dead quiet. Kendall quickly set me on the ground beside him and sat protectively in front of me putting one hand on my bare leg. I went to grab my side just as three, tall scary looking kids stood in front of us. I knew each one of them. Will Cartwright, Ben Kings, and Daniel Shoemaucker. They were kids I actually knew. I drove to school with them sometimes. They all lived on my street. They were all smart, and had already been accepted into major universities. They were always trying to ask me and my friends out, but we liked them as friends. To everyone else, they were probably odd, or outcast because they liked to talk about Star Wars and Star Trek. To me they were the fun guys to hang out with on Friday night. Ben, who is my next door neighbor was always going out with me, to school dances, taking me to lunch sometimes. But this Ben, the one standing in front of us with a shot gun was not the same Ben I knew. "Well, well, well…Kendall Knight. What an odd pleasure seeing you here." I clutched onto Kendall's sweater pulling myself closer to him locking eyes with Ben who had a stupid smile on his face. He looked so angry and yet so happy. "Looks like you got a little bit of blood on you…did we get ya?" Kendall lowered his head probably looking at his sweater and shirt covered in my blood.

"It's not mine…"

"What?! Speak up Knight!" Will, who had been talking this whole time stepped forward raising his gun. I gasped out making Kendall look up. When Will saw me, he lowered the gun fast and stepped just a little closer looking over Kendall at me. "Oh…oh I see. We missed calculated our aim boys. It looks like we hit the queen of the nerds." I let silent tears fall as Will turned around and laughed. "Sorry Benny…looks like we got your little girlfriend." I could tell Kendall didn't like hearing that. He tensed up and held onto my leg tighter. Ben stepped up and laughed down at me shaking his head.

"It's alright…she doesn't put out anyway." I let my head fall forward and rest on Kendall's shoulder crying out a little louder.

"Guys what are we doing? We going to kill this piece of shit or what? He's the fucking quarterback of the football team! Out of everyone hear, he deserves this bullet more than anyone!" I watched all three of them raise their guns, Ben pointing his right at me, smiling small. Kendall tensed up even more, and pushed me back, right behind him.

"Fucking do it already! I don't care. But don't you fucking hurt her again!" I cried out even more if that is possible and three gun shots rang through the library. I heard screams and I felt someone, hopefully Kendall. crash into me, making me fall back and lay flat on my back. And then I heard three bodies hit the floor, almost simultaneously. There were more yells and I ever heard movement but when I heard glass breaking and doors being slammed opened, the body over top of me stayed still, making em open my eyes, which I hadn't realized I closed.

"Every body stay down!" I saw two men walk over top of me both holding up big guns. They had on SWAT gear from their helmets to their boots, and it made me feel safe. "Clear…shooters are down, I repeat shooters are down. Someone bring in an EMT!" One of the men who walked over us bent down and helped Kendall off me. "Where is Carlos?"

"Dad?" I turned my head slowly seeing Carlos standing up from his corner where he was hiding and run towards the man who was now standing back up. When they collided into each other I smiled small but it fell fast. My head was turned by two hands that were wet. Kendall's perfect, beautiful face was over top of mine and he looked really scared.

"Anna? How are you doing?" I managed to get a smile out, but it faded fast when he was pushed out of my view. I started to hear a lot of talking and there a flash light clicked on over my face blinding me instantly.

"Kendall?" I felt a panic attack starting. In the past…20 maybe 30 minutes or so, he became my ultimate protector. He sat with me, holding my wound while we silently cried and listened to the gun shots and the screams and the sirens outside and around our school. I don't want to assume were soul mates now, but I was always going to have a place in my heart, and my head and my soul for Kendall Knight.

"Anna? Is she going to be okay? Can you help her, please?!" It was the last clear thing I heard. Kendall's panicked voice entered my head just as my eyes closed completely and my whole body went completely numb.

**So this is a new idea for me. I was hesitant about even writing it in the beginning. The idea of a school shooting scared the hell out of me when I was in high school and even now the thought scares me. But I'm a writer and I was inspired by a song by Kelly Rowland called Stole. This happened and if you like it, don't like it, want me to continue it, let me know! I'm not saying if someone doesn't want me to continue you, I won't continue but I like to hear from all my beautiful readers. I know it might be hard to read something like this and I will try not to make it fully about the shooting because it's going to focus on the recovery and the after effect so…yeah. **


	2. Chapter 2: Not While I'm Around

The last time I was in a hospital…I had a broken shoulder. Bad hit in football. Like a really bad hit in football. It was awful. I never wanted to step foot in this hospital again. But right now, none of that mattered. What I needed was to hear that she was oaky. That she was going to make it, and when she got out of here I was going to do the one thing I had always wanted to do. The one thing I was planning on doing today, in the library moments before guns started going off. It wasn't a coincidence I was in that library when she was. I was there for a reason, a row away from her. I was peeking through the shelves looking at her as she got her text books. My palms were sweaty and I was a nervous wreck. But I was going to do it. It took me three years to realize what I wanted, and that was her. I finally grew big enough balls to ask this girl out and what happens? The school goes on lock down with three deranged kids shooting at random. I at first thought it was a sign that maybe she wouldn't want to go out with me, but when I heard a soft, sweet little cry, I knew there was an even bigger reason I was in that library. Because when I walked around my book case and saw her on her butt leaning against a shelf holding her bloody side, I knew my whole purpose was to save this girl. That may make me sound like a douche bag, or…egotistical, but if it hadn't been for my wanting to ask the prettiest girl out in school, who knows what could have happened? She might not have been seen or heard. Maybe no one would have known she was hit. And then what? What if she had died?

I looked up quick hearing three pairs of footsteps. I forced my sick thoughts out of my head and forced a pained smile at my family walking towards me. My mom was holding a bag, one of my smaller gym bags. It looked like it had clothes in it. My mom was also crying, in complete hysterics, ever since I saw her. Her eyes were red and puffy and she still had on her scrubs form work. This hospital, actually is where she works, and she told me she got the call form my dad that there was a shooting at my school. Now my dad…he was visibly shaken up. But he never cried. He just grabbed ahold of me, while still holding my sister and told me he was glad I was alright. I hated to wonder if the worst part for them was when I walked out, out of the school that would never be the same, surrounded by cops, covered in blood. And I was covered in blood. I hadn't realized when Anna clung onto my body, how bloody her hands were. So when I picked her up and stood up, she put her arms around my neck and smeared her blood all over my head, my neck and my face. And the blood wouldn't stop coming out of her side. I was drenched form my chest down to my waist in this poor girls blood. Walking out to my parents like that probably wasn't the easiest for them. And to make the situation worse, Carlos's dad who happens to be the chief of police and the guy who found us all in the library told my parents what I did. That I was a hero. He told them I had guns pointed down at my face, and I was seconds away from being killed. That really destroyed my mom and the whole ride to the hospital, my mom didn't let me go. "Since you won't go home right now I brought you some clothes to change into." My mom sat on my left side, while my dad got on the right. I gently took my bag from my mom and smiled at them still. "I wish you would at least go home to shower." She wiped under her eyes and shook her head.

"I need to make sure she's alright mom. I'm not leaving until I can literally see her breathing." My dad put a hand on my shoulder and squeezed it, nodding.

"I understand…Jennifer let the boy deal with it the way he needs." I glanced over at my dad and smiled sincerely at him. He chuckled and pointed behind him at my younger sister. "You're sister was worried sick about you. I believe you promised her you would walk around campus with her at lunch." I let my eyes fall on her slowly and saw something that I had never seen in my baby sisters eyes. Fear.

"I'm sorry baby sis." She looked away quick and wiped under her eyes making my dad reach out quick and pull her into his side. She pushed her head into his neck and wrapped around his broad body as best as she could. Guilt washed over me seeing how upset my sister was and also reached out. Something stopped me. I was still covered in blood. Some of it not dried yet. I stood up quick clutching onto my bag and cleared my throat. "I'm going to go change and clean up a bit. Katie…do you want to come with me?" Katie stood up fast untangling herself form our dad and grabbed my free hand pulling me along quick. I glanced back at my parents smiling small. My mom smiled back and scooted over to sit next to my dad. I turned my head to the front and squeezed my baby sisters hand.

We walked down the hallway, knowing where to go because our mom worked here. When we got in front of the bathroom, it was open and it was only a one person one. I looked down at my sister who wiped under her eyes and chuckled. "I'm not gonna look big brother." I rolled my eyes and stepped in, letting her walk in behind me and close the door. I quickly set my bag on the sink and unzipped my black hoodie. "I got your text right after 4th period. I went out to your car and when I put the key in the driver door, I heard the gun shots." I glanced at the back of my baby sisters head in the mirror and gently set the hoodie down reaching for the bottom of my shirt. "It freaked me out really bad so I got in your car. I honestly thought it was a prank. You know…seniors pranking us little freshmen." I looked down after taking off my shirt and felt nauseous seeing the red stains on my fairly tan skin. "But then a lot of people came running out to the parking lot." I grabbed some paper towels, wet them and started to wash off my body. "I called you. You didn't answer, and then you never came out. I kept calling you Kendall. I was so scared something had seriously happened and you were hurt." I swallowed hard looking back at the back of her head and tossed the now bloody paper towel into the open trash can. "SO then I tried calling Logan, and James and Carlos, and none of you guys were answering. I knew you had said you were in the library trying to ask a girl out, but…" She stopped and sniffled putting her head down. I quickly kicked off my shoes, undid my belt and jeans, and slipped them off. I dug through my bag seeing a new pair of jeans and grabbed them quick. I pulled them on buttoned and zipped them up fast, turning. I also stuck my hand in the bag again and grabbed my new clean shirt. "There was this girl…she was crying with her phone pressed to her ear and was talking, well I thought she was talking to someone, but she was leaving a voicemail. I got out of your car and watched her as she stopped in front of your car. I asked her if she was alright, and if she knew what was happening. She told me three guys had guns on the campus and were shooting at random. She told me when needed to get off the property and wait for the cops, so I followed her. She told me her best friend was in the library where the shooting was happening and that she wasn't answering her phone and then it hit me. You were in the library and I didn't know if I would ever be able to see my big brother again." I walked up behind her quickly, spun her and pulled her into my body. Her small skinny fragile arms wrapped around my torso ad she cried, hard and loud in my chest. "You were supposed to meet right after 4th period Kendall. You weren't supposed to go to the library." I closed my eyes letting my tears hit the top of her head and squeezed onto her tight. However, having my eyes closed meant I could replay the events that took place, two hours ago. A gun pointed down in my face…having a girl, a girl I had a serious crush on, almost die in my arms…I opened my eyes fast and swallowed hard letting her shake around me still and cry.

"I'm sorry Katie. You're right…I should have gone straight to see you. I'm so sorry baby sister."

"Don't do it again jerk." I smiled hearing her sassy voice through her tears and carefully wiped under my eyes. "Please tell me the girl you were going to ask out wasn't the one you saved." I laughed and we pulled away. I walked back to my mess of bloody clothes and shoes, and sat down untying them just to put them back on.

"Why?"

"Well because now she has to say yes to you. You saved her life, I've heard." I frowned and eyed her as she blew her nose and wiped her eyes with some paper towels. "Oh and that girl I ran into that walked me out to where some teachers and other kids were standing, waiting for the cops…her name is Camille. She's your year and the girl you saved is her best friend. It's funny how the universe works like that." I eyed her carefully pushing on my other shoe and couldn't help agree with her 100%.

We walked back out into the waiting room hand in hand. I made a stupid joke about her first day of high school being worse than mine and I got kicked in the shin. We actually laughed and held onto each other tighter but it all crumbled away seeing the new guests in the waiting room. Sitting right by my parents were two other parental types. From the tears and the smiles I could tell it was Anna's parents. She had her mom's eyes but her dads smile. I was frozen in my spot. Katie actually let my hand go and continued to walk, just so she could sit on my dad lap and hug onto him tight. Seeing this, both Anna's parents turned and stood up slowly, staring at me. Her mother, immediately started to cry even more. I look down, and faintly saw out of the corner of my eye blood still on my neck and arms. I looked up again just in time to have tis crying women collide into my body and hug the life out of me. I stared awkwardly at the four in front of me, making my mom laugh and wipe her eyes, walking towards us. When my mom reached us, she gently rubbed the ladies back and cupped my face. "This is Anna's mother, Julia. And that is her father Brad." I gently hugged around the short women who had the same color hair as Anna. "They just got to see her. She's out of surgery and doing very well. She is asking to see you, if you'd like. But her parents want to talk to you first." I swallowed hard and nodded staring at her dad who was the same height and build as my own dad. They are both, tall and intimidating looking. If it was this circumstance, of me saving their daughters life, this man might actually scare me. But he didn't. He gently pulled his crying wife off my body and let her cry in his instead. I nervously shoved my hands in my pockets as Brad cleared his throat.

"You…you have no idea how grateful we are for you." I looked down feeling my cheeks burn instantly. "You saved my little girls life. The chief of police told me you were very protective of her when they came in. He told me you were demanding they took care of her and made sure she was okay. You…just know, we will forever be in your debut. Anything you could ever need or want, my wife and I will give. Please…thank you so much Kendall Knight. You are a hero among men." I swallowed hard and looked up smiling small. "Julia…you want to say anything to him?" Her mother wailed out and threw herself at me again, almost collapsing. I caught her and held her up rubbing her back gently. Brad sighed and pulled her off me once again shaking his head. "Sorry…Anna is our only child. It has been a living nightmare, knowing she could have been taken form us today. We have you to thank that she is still with us." I was starting to become very uncomfortable with everything he was saying and gently cleared my throat.

"Is it alright if I see her now?" Her dad smiled and nodded, looking to my mom.

"I can take him. Please…get some coffee or some food. If you want, I can have my husband pick something up for you guys if you need. You are not alone in this." My mom put a hand on my back and gently turned me walking me towards the ICU section of the hospital. I glanced back once to see my dad and Brad talking, and smiling small while Katie looked up at Julie with big sad brown eyes. We didn't walk very long. In fact when we stopped in front of a closed door, I was almost surprise out of I suddenly couldn't do this anymore. I mean…I just almost saw the girl die in my arms. How could I face her like this? I wasn't brave and I wasn't strong. Not for this anyway. My mom reached out to grab the handle but I stopped her quick. She looked up at me worried and then smiled small hugging me tight. "Sweetheart…it is because of you this girl is alive. She wants to see you. And from what your sister told me, you like her, and probably really want to see her right now. She's going to be okay. You don't have to worry about anything. Go make her smile, and laugh and forget about her pain for a few minutes. Because the next time she sees her parents, she will be reminded of what happened and that is the last thing she'll want. Okay?" I only nodded and dumbly letting her push the door open.

The room was quiet and dimly lit. I heard a little beep every now and then, and my mom turned on the light almost as soon as she got to the bed. She turned the little light on, on the nightstand and pushed a button on a touch screen monitor. More beeps started to come out of the machine, making em slightly panic. I walked closer, but tried to not look at her yet. Instead I looked at the machine and saw some numbers and the little green swiggly line bouncing up and down. "Is she alright? What are those beeps?" My mom turned her head and smiled reaching for my arm. She pulled me forward making me finally look down at Anna. Except Anna wasn't sleeping like I had assumed. She was awake, cheeks flushed red, no glasses on her face. "Anna? Are…are you alright?" My mom kissed my cheek softly before excusing herself and telling em to push the small red button if something happened. I watched until the door closed before turning back to Anna. She was pushing herself up slowly and gasped quietly when she finally was in a sitting position.

"I hate to ask this but…do you see my glasses?" I smiled noticing how she wasn't looking at me and looked so nervous. It was cute. I gently grabbed the black rimmed glasses on the table by a pitcher of water and the lamp. I put them out in front of her and she grabbed them pushing them on her nose fast. She then tucked hair behind her ears and kept her head bowed down clearing his throat. "I'm glad you're here. I know…you probably want to go home and see if all your friends are okay, but I just wanted to tell you before I never talk to you again, thank you." She finally looked up at me and smiled small. "You saved my life. You sat with me and made me feel safe. Thank you Kendall." I smiled small and carefully set myself down on the edge of the bed. I couldn't help but notice my sweaty hands as I rubbed the back of my neck.

"Why wouldn't I see you again?" The room went quiet, sickly quiet, as I stared at her. She looked speechless, again…really cute. She closed her mouth fast and looked down pulling the blanket up around her slim stomach. "Anna…"

"You're you Kendall." My smile fell as she shrugged and looked anywhere but at me. "I mean…you're the Kendall Knight…quarterback of the football team. You're Mr. Popular. You've been prom king every year since you were a freshman. You're dating Jo Taylor…I mean…you and I don't really run with the same pack."

"That doesn't mean I don't like you." I couldn't stop the words even though it wasn't how I was planning on telling her I liked her. But it caught her attention. And I don't know if she was now crying because I said it, or if she was in pain. I moved forward, getting a little closer to her and gently set my hand on her arm. She put her head down and let a few tears fall. And then it hit me. Something Will had said in the library. To Ben, about Anna being his girlfriend. Was she now crying because she lost her boyfriend? Or was it hard to look at a guy who made those kids lives living hell? "I'm sorry I fi ever hurt you. Picked on you, and your friends…made fun of your friends." She turned her head away and shook it softly. A little sob came out making me feel like a complete jackass. "I'm just going to leave you alone. I'm so sorry Anna." I pushed off the bed fast and turned ready to walk out of the room, find a hole and bury myself for the rest of my life.

"Do you remember that party Logan threw at the end of last year?" I stopped walking, frozen in my tracks and close my eyes hard, letting more tears fall out. "He invited me…and Ben and Will and Daniel. I brought my girlfriends Camille and Sam because I knew how crazy a football players party could get. I just wanted a night where me and my friends weren't looked at weird, or no one said anything stupid to me. But…wishful thinking on my idiotic brain's part." I slowly opened my eyes and turned to face her. She was staring at me wiping off the tears running down her face. "Ben and the guys went off to get us some drinks. Camille actually got asked to dance and then Sam needed to go to the bathroom, so I was left alone. I don't actually remember seeing you there, but some other guys form the football team came up to me and started asking me stupid questions. One of them grabbed my hips and tried to push his hands up my skirt in the back. And then Ben came back." She closed her eyes and cried out loud, shaking her head. In-between sobs she started to talk again. "Ben pushed the guy off me and called him an asshole…they started hitting him Kendall! There was 5 against one! It was really fair. And the worst part was no one even cared enough to try to stop it! No one really cared until they threw him in the pool. I know…I know every single one of those guys knew he didn't know hot to swim." She opened her eyes and gasped out looking at me. "They almost let him drown Kendall…all while they called him a faggot and a nerd and a freak. Do you know what that did to him? That night after he dropped everyone else off he sat in front of my house with me and told me he would never let them hurt him again, or make him feel bad about himself again. I should have known…I should have told someone he was getting bullied, but I didn't. Because I didn't know it would come to this!" She yelled at me and clenched her fists throwing them down at her sides. Something stirred inside me. I move forward quick, grabbed her shoulders and pulled her into my chest. It felt…right. Again. It felt like this was exactly how it should be.

I'm not sure how but us talking, well her mostly screaming at me, making me feel like an even bigger asshole lead us to lying on her bed. Together. I barely knew the girl, yet here she was, crying on my chest. Again. I didn't mind. I liked her company, even if she told me she hated me, I'd love every second of it. It wasn't until my cell went off and I sat up, we actually pulled away. I pulled it out of my pocket and sighed seeing Carlos's number. "_My dad just got home looking at Ben and Will's houses. He isn't telling me all the details, but he said Ben left suicide notes to his mom and dad, and Anna. They are going to drop it off to her, after they read it .I know your still with her…me and Logan are coming by. Your mom wants us to take you home so you can get cleaned up bro. We're here for you." _I slowly turned around and smiled at Anna as she pulled her hair up into a messy bun on the top of her hair. "Do you know why I was there?" She dropped her arms from her head and frowned tilting her head to the side. "The library…I was there to ask you out." Her cheeks went red, really red and she bowed her head down. I smiled, reached out and touched her cheek rubbing under her eye. She looked back up at me and smiled biting her bottom lip at the same time. "You can say no…but I was wondering if I could take you out, once you got out of the hospital?" She laughed, probably nervously and nodded looking right in my eyes. I smiled slowly getting off her bed and cleared my throat. "Is it alright if I come see you tomorrow?"

"I would love it…" I nodded and awkwardly stood at the side of her bed. She laughed and slowly laid herself back down putting a hand on her side, where she was shot. "Can you do me one favor Kendall?" I nodded getting slower to the top of the bed where her beautiful head was laying. "Whenever we all go back to school…after they've cleaned the blood and took out all the bullets form the walls, can you promise me…you won't let people talk bad about Ben? I mean…I don't expect you to defend him for everything I just…I knew him. I knew him as a funny, smart nice guy, and I don't want everyone to only remember him as the kid who shot up the school. Can you just…"

"Anna…" I leaned down gently setting my forehead on hers and softly rubbed my nose against hers. "No one can take your memories away. No one can make you think he was a bad guy, especially if you knew he wasn't. I can tell people to keep their opinions to themselves, but ultimately, how they feel, and what they say, is their decision. No one, however, will try to tell you not to care about him. No one will ever make you see him as a bad guy. Not while I'm around. And I promise you Anna…things will change, and right now, you may not think for the better but…it is and once you let the smoke settle and the dust fade, you will see a blues sky again, and you will watch a flower bloom. It's how this world works. We get the bad…but not without the good." Her arms flew around my neck fast pulling me down into her, hugging me. I smiled hugging back and even kissed the side of her head. I heard a soft knock and then the door opening.

"Oh…let's' wait Julia." Anna's parents. I smiled even bigger and gently pulled myself away from her. I glanced around the room, spotting a notepad and walked to it. I quickly wrote down my number and ripped the page off the pad walking back to her. I set it on her lap and she blushed wiping tears away.

"SO this is what it takes to get your number?" I laughed and so did she as she folded it, laid down and pushed the paper under her pillow. "Thanks…for everything." I nodded, bent down again, kissed her cheek and smiled.

"Call me. I don't care if it's 2 in the morning, and you just don't want to be alone in the dark. You call me, okay? I'll come running." She closed her eyes, swallowing hard but nodded. 

**SO….just curious. Would anyone be interested in seeing other people's P.O.V. like the rest of the guys…maybe Katie? Or would it be better if I just kept it to Kendall and Anna? Because I can go either way. Also does anyone hate me for taking the easy way out and making Ben's motives for shooting, being that he was bullied? Is that way to cliché? Let me hear your thoughts. And I'm so glad people liked it and wanted me to continue! **


	3. Chapter 3: Sunrise After A Hurricane

If I closed my eyes, I could feel his lips on my cheek. And if I really tried hard enough, I could hear his soft heartbeat. If I really wanted, I could just hug around my pillow and imagine it has him. But when I open my eyes, stop trying to hear something that isn't there, I'm left with the painful, bitter silence. It hurts. Down to my bones and it makes my teeth clench and that stinging pain in my left hip to come back up again. The second he left this room, the darkness crept in, the silence surrounded me, and I became ice cold. How sad is it that I'm so desperate to have any kind of connection form him, that I'm clinging to the small piece of paper that has his number on it? Pretty darn sad if you ask me. I'm not quite sure what could make me feel better, unless of course Kendall Knight was lying in my bed with me again. "Surprise." I turned my body slowly so I was lying flat on my back and smiled at the door. Of course if I can't have Kendall Knight, I could take my two best friends.

Camille and Sam. My best friends since we were two. I loved these girls like my sisters, and the best part was that all of us were only children so we were like sisters. What's the saying. "God couldn't handle us as sisters, so he made us best friends." That was us and I loved it more than any cute boy with sweet dimples. Okay maybe not that much because that cute boy with sweet dimples might actually be the love of my life. "We would have been here sooner but…" Sam gently sat down on my right side holding out a small white gift bag with dark blue tissue paper. "My mom wouldn't let me go, and my dad was demanding, already, with the principle to put metal detectors in the front of the school." I smiled small and started to push myself up. Camille rushed to my left side and held onto my arm, helping me sit up. I laid back onto the headboard of my hospital bed and sighed putting the gift bag on my lap. "Well open it. We picked it up after I got Camille." I glanced between both of them, rolling my eyes and pulled out the two sheets of tissue paper. I set them right by Sam's leg and reached in again feeling something hard, and cold. I slowly pulled it out and as soon as I saw it, I felt my bottom lip quiver. "I know it's kind of cheesy…it's just a little angle. Because you're our little angle now." I held the small glass figurine in my hand and looked form Sam to Camille. Camille was crying. Hard, but not making one word. I set the figurine in my lap and reached out, pulling them both into me. We hugged and Camille cried out, loudly and almost as soon as we touched.

I'm not sure why, but we all cried and hugged onto each other. And not for like, 20 minutes. Not for two hours. The whole night. I woke up, to a horrible pain and a loud continuous beep. My two best friends were right on my sides with me on my bed. But then Kendall's mom, Jennifer, who was my nurse was standing on my left ide injected something into my IV. I groaned quietly pushing Camille's head off my chest and closed my eyes rubbing my eyes softly. "I didn't have the heart to wake them up, but we need to check your bandages."

"Kick em off." I opened my eyes to see Mrs. Knight laughing and gently shaking Camille's shoulder. I did the same to Sam and cleared my throat loudly. "Guys get up. Your bony bodies are digging into my own body bony." Both girls slowly pushed up, and Camille blushed seeing Jennifer. They got off my bed, yawning and rubbing their eyes, pulling their phones out and checking for the time probably. "How long have we been sleeping?"

"About 6 hours. It's just now 2. Here…rise up slowly honey." She put her hands on my shoulder and reached down underneath my gown gently tearing off the band aid. I cringed rolling my head to the front closing my eyes. "Girls don't go anyway. I'm having the boys bring up two small beds because your parents came by, dropping off some very beautiful flowers for you my dear." I slowly raised my head and saw Camille look to Jennifer confused.

"Boys?" Just as she said it my door was opened and four guys came walking in, two holding one bed, each. Camille and Sam rushed to the right side of my bed and Jennifer moved my gown around to put on a new clean bandage. I blushed instantly seeing Kendall first, and Logan next. I pushed my hair down on my head as best I could and saw Camille look to me also blushing. Someone had a huge crush on Logan Mitchell. I smirked looking at Kendall who straightened up and smiled at me, holding a small gift bag, much like the one my girlfriends gave me. Except his bag was deep red, with yellow tissue paper.

"Are you hungry?" I turned to Jennifer quick and nodded, actually feeling my stomach growl. "Okay, I'm going to go get you some food. You four cannot technically be in here because visiting hours over but I pulled some strings. Just don't be loud, don't run around the hospital chanting Satanic sayings…" She looked directly at Carlos who blushed and nudged into James, who were both standing awkwardly behind Kendall and Logan. "And if she kicks you out, you leave." Jennifer kissed her sons cheek, turned to the door and walked to it, but stopped with her hand on the knob. She turned to me, suddenly very pale and worried looking. She cleared her throat, reached into the front pocket of her scrubs and pulled out a folded piece of paper. "The police dropped this off for you. I'm giving it to you against my better judgment." She walked to me, setting the paper on my lap and turned, walking out quick. The whole room was dead quiet. I looked around noticing all 6 of them staring at me, pleading em to open it up and read it out loud. Except I didn't. I picked it up, and opened it with shaky hands. I looked down, pretending no one was watching me carefully. The first thing I noticed about the paper, was my name, written in a beautiful cursive, that only one person could have written. It was enough for me to close the note, crumble it up in my hand and make two hard fists shoving them down on my lap. The tears fell freely out of my eyes without my permission.

"Anna…what is it?" I shook my head hearing Camille right next to me. "Can I see it?" I shook my head harder more aggressively and sobbed out. "Anna…"

"He left me a note Camille!" The room went quiet again an I cried down the rest of words. I didn't hate him. I mean, a part of me did, but this was worse than any feeling of being looked down at like he did to me in that library. Was this supposed to be my guilt trip? Because I didn't spread my legs for him? Was I to blame for him being unstable?

"Do you want to be left alone?" Camille sounded in tears making em raise my head and look at her. I had wet marks on my glasses but ignored them. Camille sat on my bed, turning her back to everyone in the room. Sam was crying by herself, but she actually wasn't. I looked over Camille's head and saw Carlos move towards her slowly and put a hand on her shoulder. I looked back ot Camille and smiled small.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap at you. The last thing I want, is to be left alone." She put her head down wiping her nose sniffling. "Not to sound like a jerk but is there a reason you guys are here?" I looked directly at Kendall who smiled and looked at his friends. He cleared his throat and walked slowly towards my left side.

"I couldn't sleep. I mean after I left you, I went home, took a shower and had a pathetic cry fest with my baby sister until she fell asleep in my arms." I smiled small and moved my leg a bit letting him sit on my bed. Camille raised her head slowly and stared at him, as he continued. "After I took her to her room, I went down to see my dad, who was having his own cry fest looking at my baby pictures and told me, it hadn't hit him until then, that he could have lost me." The whole room shifted awkwardly and I sat back a little. "And then it hit me." He gently set the bag on my lap and looked back at his friends. "I called them and asked them to meet me here. We have something we want to talk to you about, and were actually happy you two are here, as well." My friends perked up a bit and looked between all four guys before stopping on Kendall. "Earlier, while I was here, you asked me a favor, right?" I nodded getting a little confused and took my glasses off, to wipe them off. When I put them back on Kendall gently took my hand and laced our fingers together. I saw a stupid smile spread across Camille's face, knowing she was thinking we were already banging. I ignored her, as well as Sam, who was wiping off her tears and also smiling small. "Well I'm willing to take that favor to the extreme. I also dragged them along, but when they heard what I wanted to do, they had no problem being volunteered." I looked over at the other three guys who were smiling almost smug like. "When we all go back to school, you and your friends, will never get bothered again. I will make it my mission to make sure no one, not one single person says something stupid to you guys. No one will make a comment about Ben, or Will, or Daniel, or your friendship ever. No dumb jock, asshole while try to make some kind of stupid move, and no bitchy prom queen cheerleader will make fun of you ever again. And I'm not the only one who is going to make sure of it, and you are not the only who will be looked after." I couldn't help the smile seeing Camille turn directly to Logan who walked to the end of my bed, clearing his throat.

"Think of us as your very own…body guards. No one can get past us. Trust me." He smiled warmly at Camille who turned to me, blushing but smiling small.

"As nice as that is, I know guys like you." I turned to Sam quick who shrugged Carlos's hand off her shoulder and glared at Sam, squeezing Kendall's hand. "I appreciate you saving my best friend life, but once an asshole jock, always an asshole jock."

"Sam." Camille shot up quick but Sam ignored her.

"I'm supposed to just fall for a nice guy image right now, just to be fucked over in two weeks when your slutty girlfriends come crawling back to you?" I groaned putting my head back shaking it softly. "In case you guys haven't noticed, the reason three of my best friends are dead, is because of you." My hand was squeezed hard an di know that hurt all four of them but none of them said anything. "And in case you haven't noticed, yet…we can take care of ourselves. We don't need your muscles and your bullying techniques to make people feel sorry for us. Bullying is what led us to this." I raised my head slowly and looked at Sam. She was completely heartbroken. She was sobbing hysterically. I guess being shot, makes you a little selfish. I didn't even think about how not a week ago, she lost her virginity to Daniel. It was something she only told Camille and I. And I honestly thought they were just friends but…not for that one night.

"Actually Sam, I have never bullied a person in my entire life." We all turned to Carlos who looked like he was close to crying, himself. "Whenever I saw one of my football friends, picking on someone, saying something stupid. I stopped them." Carlos stepped forward making Sam look up and give him her best scary look. "But why would you notice any of that right? God forbid the girl who has no problem judging anyone else actually takes the time to get those people she's judging. No…you know what Sam. You're right. You don't need us, you never have. So why don't we just leave and never talk to you guys again." Carlos was now crying and he turned away quick walking to the door. He walked out, slamming the door hard behind him making all of us jump. I squeezed Kendall's hand harder and looked to him. He nodded to James who sighed and nodded, grabbing Sam's upper arm and dragging her to the door. Once the door shut I turned to Camille who looked confused and then sad.

"Why did she just react like that? That looked like it was almost a fight between a couple." Logan chucked and walked up to the chair right next to my bed sitting softly.

"Well they would look like a couple fighting because they are a couple." My mouth parted open and Camille sat down on my bed hard. Logan smiled, looking between us, but it fell fast. He cleared his throat sitting up straight and looked to Kendall, probably. "What she didn't tell you guys?" Camille crossed her arms over her chest and tilted her head. "Well they've been dating since my party at the end of last year. I guess Carlos swept her off her feet asking her to dance but then Daniel found out and…" He stopped and looked away from me shaking his head. "It was like a turf war. One calming they could take care of her better. It ruing my whole summer to be completely honest. And then what…like a week ago Carlos comes over to my house, me and Kendall and James are just hanging out, and he tells us she broke up with him. It killed him and then…this all happened. If I had to take a guess, it's probably eating Sam up that…Daniel is gone and somewhere deep down, Carlos feels guilty…I don't know." He looked back to us and shrugged, looking like he wanted to yawn.

"Why would she not tell us they were dating?" Camille and I looked at each other and she pouted. "We've been trying to make that girl ask him out for years and she finally does, but behind our backs. Skank." She stood herself up smoothed out her skirt and pointed to me. "And you two." I blushed letting Kendall's hand go and bit my bottom lip. Camille looked at me but then turned to Kendall. "You break her heart, I swear to God Knight I will kill you with my bare hands. And if you so much as make one tear fall out of her beautiful brown eyes, I will tell your sweet mother on you and make her punish you in the most severe of ways."

"Camille…" I yanked her down hard making her sit back down the bed and she huffed out staring at me. "I know your upset at Sam for not telling us but think about who we hung around, and think of who Carlos hangs around."

"Modern day Romeo and Juliet if you ask me," I turned to Kendall who shrugged and took my hand again squeezing it, before running his thumb over my knuckles. "I hope…and yet I'm sad, that what happened might change how everyone at school treats each other." The words fell down around the four of us, leaving us in pained silence. It was only interrupted when the door opened and James walked in shaking his head. Following him was Sam and Carlos who looked more than made up. Carlos had his arms around Sam who was crying in his chest hiding her face. I smiled small sneakily scooting closer to Kendall still standing next to my bed.

"So…" Camille glanced around and sighed out. "Has anyone heard about school? I mean…when it will be opened again? What's going on?"

"I heard their giving everyone two weeks. They have to clean up I guess. And I guess, they counted it out, and two weeks is the appropriate mourning time for high school students before they have to go back to a place they hate." I looked to James who spoke for the first time and saw only sadness. "I don't really know you girls. I've only heard stories, about how pretty you are, how sweet you are and how you only see the good in people." We locked eyes for some reason making me a little tense. "You probably knew those guys better than anyone else. If you say they were good guys, who were nice and regular 17 year old kids then I…" He stopped and looked around between me, Sam, and Camille. "Then I believe you, and I will do whatever it takes to make the school see that they aren't those guys who brought guns to school. That there was something more because bad things shouldn't happen to good people." He pointed quick to me, probably because of my side and sighed out shoving his hand sin his pockets. "I hope they day we all go back to school you three don't think about the three friends you lost. Because you've gained 4 more." I turned quick to Kendall who was staring down at me. "Maybe something more with some of us…" I blushed again and looked away smiling, but also letting some tears fall. Here I was, assuming the dumb football player was a thoughtless emotionless asshole, yet here he was making em cry and changing my mind completely.

Everyone sort of started to sit down, whether it was on the two beds they brought in, or on my bed, my friends…all 6 of them started to sit around me. No one said anything. Sam was crying still in Carlos's arms who was rocking her gently pressing his lips into her head. James sat on the other bed, looking kind of lonely but rather content with his surroundings. Logan was still sitting In the chair next to me, and would occasionally glance up at Camille, who finally laid back down with me, because I pulled her down with me. Kendall sat on the edge of my bed, holding my hand still and wouldn't stop staring at me. Something…happened. It was an unspoken agreement. We are friends. We were no longer standing on opposite sides, criticizing each other for stupid reasons. We were all sitting in the same room, feeling the same sadness, and dealing with the same demons. Not one of us is better than the other in this moment. Not one of us is prettier, or more popular. For once, we were all the same. And I felt something odd. Something that told me this wasn't going to be a momentary thing because I have a bullet in my hip. These four guys, who I used to be so afraid to talk to because of their popularity, were going to be my friends for a long time. And maybe James was right. Maybe something more would happen to all of us. It happened for Carlos and Sam. Kendall already asked me out on a date. And Logan and Camille can't take their eyes off each other. Was this the sunrise after a hurricane? Was this the first flower to blown after a harsh winter? Do good things, like friendships and love happen because the bad things, like a school shooting, are God's way of showing us just how strong we are?

**I didn't want to add any more P.O.V.S but that might change. I know I have a plan for James…well everyone but James story might come up soon and it might be in his P.O.V. I don't know yet. As always, let me know how you like it. **


	4. Chapter 4: Love

Staring at a blank phone is mind numbing. I know the reason she isn't responding is because she is either talking to someone else, probably in person, or she fell asleep. I could understand her falling asleep; it's almost 5 in the morning. But I am wide awake, have been since I woke up yesterday morning at 7. My sleeping pattern has gone straight down the drain along with my will to go to football practice and do any chores around the house, like cleaning my room. I also have no intention to start looking for a college to go to in less than a year like my dad wants me to start doing because nothing really makes sense right now. Except Anna. Andin my mind, anything Anna wants, does, or needs is perfect in my eyes. I have a feeling if she wanted to go across the globe for college next year, I'd probably be going with her. I hate to think that one day she could leave me, for any circumstance. And I hate to even think about us being separated for something stupid like different colleges. It would kill me. Quite literally, I'm afraid. "Kendall?" I shot up in bed fast pushing my blanket off my back and turned to face my door. I had been lying flat on my stomach with my arms under my pillow and my chin resting on my pillow. My phone was in my hand as I waited patiently for an hour to hear back from her, but now it was on the floor, thrown in my state of shock and surprise. As far as I knew everyone in the house was asleep. Except my dad apparently. "This is almost two weeks now, that you haven't slept for more than a few hours. And don't ask em how I know you haven't been sleeping. Come on…" He turned out of my room leaving the door wide open and zipped up a sweater hanging on his body. I frowned and jumped out of bed grabbing a pair of sweats I kicked to the floor as I climbed into bed after seeing Anna at the hospital. After pulling them on I grabbed a random shirt, also on the floor and my phone, and walked out leaving my door wide open.

When I got down stairs the light was on in the kitchen and I could hear my dad making coffee. I frowned and hurried to the kitchen pulling my shirt on. "Dad…what are you doing up?" I walked right next to him leaned against the counter watching him make a very strong cup of coffee.

"Well…I have a meeting at 8 this morning and I am not prepared. I am going to do a little work for an hour before I pick your mom up from work. But since you're up, maybe you could pick her up for me." He closed the lid of the coffee maker and yawned rubbing his face. "So…anything I need to be worried about?" He crossed his arms over his chest making him look ten times bigger than usual, making me also cross my arms over my chest and look down at the ground, shrugging my shoulders. "Well…your mom and I have both noticed you acting different…not cleaning, not going to practice, which I kind of agree with and it is worrying us Kendall. You can talk to us if you need to." I looked up slowly and looked around our kitchen first before turning to him and swallowing hard.

"When did you realize you were in love with mom?" He grinned big and looked out to the kitchen as well laughing quietly.

"I believe the exact date was June 17th 1982." I chuckled quietly making him turn to me and shove me gently. "Seriously. It was the first day I met your mom. We were in our twenties, I was still in the Navy, on leave and she was fresh out of college. I remember the day specifically because your mother was wearing a tiny little white and black polka dot bikini…" I shoved him back making a gaging noise, making him laugh. "We met in Texas. I was visiting your grandparents, and your mom was on summer break with some of her girlfriends. I mean I was only twenty two, I think your mom was maybe just 21…anyway, we were both on the beach for the same bon fire party and I ran into her spilling my beer all over her. I thought she was going to be one of those snotty stuck up girls who yelled at me and hit me or something. But she just kind of laughed it off, took off her top grabbed my hand and dragged me into the ocean. I won't go into details but I definitely got to know your mom that night." I slapped my forehead hard and groaned loudly making sure he heard me. "Three years later, I asked her to marry me. And then 10 years later you were born." I was playfully shoved again making me look up at him, both of us serious. "Why do you ask?" My cheeks instantly went hot and I looked down at my bare feet, which I was shuffling. "Let me guess…this has something to do with a girl named Anna?" I closed my eyes mentally kicking myself, hating that I even brought it up. "Kendall you don't have to be a certain age to love someone. And you don't have to know someone for a long period of time to know you love someone. Hell I met your mom at a drunken beach party and five minutes after apologizing for spilling on her I knew I loved her. I didn't even care that her dad hated me. I just knew if I couldn't be with her…I don't know. I'd go insane." He stopped, dropping his hands to his pockets shoving them in and smiled small. "Sound familiar?"

"Very." He laughed quietly and gently set an arm around my shoulders pulling me into him. "I've liked her for a long time. Never had the balls to ask her out. And her being shot and with all the time we've spent together…I just feel…helpless I guess. I don't know how to tell her things…well certain things. About how I feel and all that. I'm afraid it's going to ruin things, and make her hate me." He chuckled quietly and rubbed my arm a few times before turning to the beeping coffee pot.

"Kendall no one has the Manuel on how to talk to women. I'm almost 55 years old and I still don't know. It's not easy but I can guarantee the first time you tell her your true feelings she can do one of two things." He pulled down two cups for coffee but turned to me before walking to the fridge. "She can either tell you back her true feelings as well or tell her to leave her alone, she isn't interested. If she does the second one…your heart will come to terms with it and realize maybe that's for the best."

"What if I can't handle that? Because I don't think I could dad." He laughed again grabbing the milk but didn't say another word. Instead I felt a vibration from my phone and pulled it out of my sweat pocket fast hoping it was Anna. It wasn't which bummed me out bad. It was just Carlos asking if I was awake and if he could stop by. I replied yes fast and quickly took my cup of coffee from my dad. He sipped his coffee carefully as he walked to our huge dining room table at sat at the head of it looking down at the piles of paper I didn't even notice were there along with his laptop. I walked to the table and sat down quietly and just as I set my coffee on the table there were three soft knocks at the front door. I frowned knowing it was probably Carlos but didn't realize when he asked if he could come over, that meant right now. Like seconds later. I got up anyway explaining to my dad and turned on the living room light walking to the front door. I pulled it open and stepped out of the way letting in Carlos who looked exhausted but also worried and even a little sad. "Dude…you love to sleep. What are you doing up?"

"I could ask you the same thing…Hey Mr. Knight."

"Carlos…always a pleasure…even at 5 in the morning." I snickered to myself and after closing the door I followed Carlos out into the kitchen. I took my seat again and watched as he made himself a cup of coffee. "What's on your mind kid? You look troubled." He stirred in about five tablespoons of sugar and some of my mom's French Vanilla creamer before walking to us and throwing his keys and phone on the table next to his coffee. He shimmied out of his sweater and finally sat back sighed out hard and instead of looking at me, he turned to my dad.

"My dad is being suspended form work for two weeks." My mouth dropped open slowly and I heard my dad shift in his seat but I remained looking at Carlos who looked so…defeated. "I mean it's with pay but…because he gave the order to shoot them without waiting until the order form the F.B.I. agent who was there he's being blamed. An di guess one of the parents wants more answers as to why they couldn't have waited which I guess is the biggest problem…and even after my dad explained more than three times that they had three shot guns pointed down at you and Anna, they still don't think it was enough to make the call." My tongue twisted into knots and all I could do was turn to my dad and hope he knew what to do, or what to say. And he leaned forward fast and we both looked at Carlos who was now drinking half his coffee.

"Why don't they ask the parents of the kids who were killed by those three why your dad made the call? Why don't they ask Anna's parents why he made the call? Or, how about they come talk to me about why your dad made the call, because I know exactly why he made the call. He saved more lives by taking three, as gruesome as that is. And if anyone thinks you dad did nothing less than an act of heroism, they can come talk to me. And you can bet your ass if your dad gets fired or gets even more suspended I will raise holy hell. Until everyone understands what din of man your dad is." Carlos was staring at my dad with wide eyes, and I could swear it looked like he was going to cry. "When you go back to school in three days Carlos, and anyone says something stupid to you about your dad you call me right away and I will come down and deal with it myself alright? I know your father Carlos. He is a good man. I have no problem standing behind him and his decision, because it is because of him, my son is sitting right here." I looked to my dad fast and saw how upset he actually looked talking about this. He cleared his throat quietly and looked down at his work shaking his head. "I'm sorry the world works this way. I wish I could make this easier for you guys. But I can't and it…it frustrates the hell out of me." I cautiously reached out touching my dad's shoulder and flinched when he moved fast and set his hand on mine. He squeezed it still looking down at his work and sighed out. "You guys should really be getting some sleep." We let go of each other fast and I turned to Carlos who I saw only slightly, wipe the corner of his eye on his shoulder.

"Yeah I know…I just couldn't. I was up all night with my dad. And when he finally went to sleep I text James and asked if he wanted to do something but he never answered. Now I know why." He looked up at me and smiled small. I frowned and grabbed my cup of coffee.

"Why?" He laughed sitting back and grabbed his cup again.

"Because he's here…where is he by the way?" He started to look around but I turned to my dad who also now looked confused. "What…you guys don't know his car is out front? I know it's his. He didn't tell you he was here?" I stood up fast, along with my dad and we both rushed to the front door. He pulled It open and we peered out, getting even more confused. His little black BMW was there but I haven't seen him. He didn't come to the front door…

"Katie?" I was surprised to hear my dad yell so loud knowing my baby sister was fast asleep but then it hit me. And it hit me like a ton of bricks. My dad couldn't stop me as I ran up the stairs, taking them two at a time. In fact he was running just as fast up them with me. When I got to her door I didn't wait like I normally do. I didn't knock. I just barged in. Probably not the best idea. Katie was in her bed under the covers with…James. And when her bedroom door smacked into the wall they both shot up and James flew out of the bed almost falling to his face. I was completely speechless. I felt lost. I didn't know what to say or what to do.

"Dad! What are you doing?! Get out of my room!"

"What the hell is he doing in here Katie Knight!?" Katie jumped out of bed grabbing a sweater and pulling it on. She only had a little white tank top on, with black shorts and I hated to think my best friend…one of my best friends was lying next to her like that.

"Well I invited him here and because he's my boyfriend! Don't you two know privacy! Well…three. Hey Carlos."

"Hey!" I snapped my head back fast and glared at him shaking my head. He giggled taking a sip of his coffee. I turned back to the three people who, two looked angry, and one looked like he was about to piss himself. I think we all know which one that one was.

"Boyfriend! He's three years older than you, and your brothers friend! No way in hell Katelyn Knight!" My dad took a step forward and pointed to James. "YOU! Down stairs right now! Don't you dare leave and you better think of a really good God damn reason why you're in my daughters bed at 5 in the morning!" James swallowed hard and grabbed his shoes, his wallet and phone and sweater before walking past my dad. He stopped however when he spotted me and swallowed hard. "Now Diamond!" James jumped and pushed past me hurrying out of the room. "What is the rule Katie?!"

"Dad we were just sleeping. You know…actually sleeping! And that rule is only for Kendall." My mouth dropped open as I stepped forward ready to defend myself. But my dad put out an arm and stopped me. Katie was giving me a death glare.

"The reason your brother was given that rule is because I know how stupid guys can be!" I frowned and looked to my dad but he waved me off. "I don't care what your excuse is or what one you're going ot give me or how you're going to give me it. He doesn't come here again and you're going to drop this whole "boyfriend" thing."

"Daddy!"

"No!" Katie jumped slightly hearing my dad yell down at her. She pouted out her bottom lip and crossed her arms over her chest. She was giving my dad the classic puppy dog look but my dad wasn't going to buy it. "You are grounded! No friends…no phone and no computer! One month!" My dad waked to her desk fast, yanked her phone off the charger and grabbed her laptop.

"You're being unfair daddy! I didn't do anything wrong!"

"Except lie and let him sneak in! No more arguing Katie! Wait until your mother gets home!" My dad turned shoved past me hitting my shoulder with his. "Kendall let's go. Stay up here young lady, I'm not kidding." I turned quick not wanting to see my sister crying, because she was and walked out of the room. My dad slammed the door hard before hurrying down the stairs. I followed fast and suddenly got really afraid for my best friend. My dad…my dad trains with MMA fighters on the weekend. He could kill you with his pinky thanks to the Seal training he got in the Navy. How James could have been this stupid I could never guess. "I'm going to leave any physical fight to my son who I know is seconds away from ripping you apart." My dad tossed the computer and phone on the couch before walking right up to James who was backed up against our fireplace. He looked terrified. "Instead you and I are going to have a man to man talk about what the fuck just happened."

"I wasn't doing anything, or going to do anything." My dad laughed and backed away from him nodding.

"Good. Start off with a bold face lie James. You don't think I know you? You don't think I haven't heard the stories you and Logan and Carlos and Kendall tell each other?!" James turned very pale very quick and looked down. "I know you are called a lady killer and a player and if you think ii would ever let you near my daughter, even with a 30 foot pole you have taken to many hits to the head from football. If I ever catch you in my house for any other reason than seeing Kendall, if he even wants to see you anymore, I will teach you the three different ways you can paralyze a person with one hand. And please believe me James if you come near her again or try anything else again I will rip off your balls and feed them to you. Get the fuck out of my house before I do it now." James looked up fast and nodded clenching his jaw hard walking past my dad. James stepped out of the house and closed the door fast btu now it was my turn. I rushed to the door and pulled it open faintly hearing my dad behind me. "Don't kill him…" I rushed down after him and got right in front of him putting a hand on his shoulder. He locked eyes with me and for a minute I couldn't think of what to say. He helped me out with that.

"I haven't done anything to her. I haven't forced her to do anything and I never would. I actually really like Katie and I would never hurt her." I dropped my hand form his shoulder fast and swallowed hard. "We started talking after everything happened at school. It led to her telling em she thought I was cute and then I kissed her and now were here. I know you think you know who I am but you don't. And for some reason I know you think you have to protect your sister from me, but you don't. But there is no way I can change your mind or your dads so I'll just leave and never talk to her again. But it is not my fault if she hates you."

"Why did you have to do it behind my back?" He walked past me shoulder checking me only pissing me off more. "If you had respect for her, you would have come to me and my dad and talked to us like a man."

"Like a man!?" James turned back to me fast and was now seething with rage. "Like how your dad just kicked me out and didn't give me or Katie a minute to explain!?"

"You were in her bed James!"

"Doing nothing but sleeping asshole!"

"Yeah well she's not the first girl you sweet talked your way too, and she won't be the last! She deserves better!" He slowly let his shoulders fall and his mouth part slightly. The moment of me being a dick and saying something like that, to my best friend passed when he opened the passenger door of his car and threw his things in it.

"You know what…if that's how you really think I am than fuck you dickhead. I won't bother you or your sister again. Fuck you jackass." He walked to the driver side and pulled the door open fast getting in. I heard a door slam behind me and then someone running out of the house. James literally peeled away from the curb and speed off down the street just as Katie rushed past me and onto the street. She was barefoot but she didn't even care. She stopped her foot and turned to me. She was violently sobbing.

"How could you do that to me!" She rushed to me and started hitting my chest, stomach and arms, barely making a bruise. "I hate you! I hate you so much!" I tried to grab her arms to stop her but she only shoved me away and ran past me back to the house I turned and walked behind her caught the front door before she slammed it on me. I shut it quietly and watched her push past my dad who was telling her to calm down. She hurried up the stairs, with not a second later, her door slammed hard. TH whole house went quiet and I spotted Carlos who looked awkward and uncomfortable sitting on the couch. He slowly stood up himself up and cleared his throat.

"Man….Monday is going to be really, really awkward."


	5. Chapter 5: Crawl Into Your Soul

I don't know why I came in by myself. I should have let someone drive me, or at least driven with someone. I had the offers but I turned them all down. Not because I'm a bitch. I don't know why I turned them down actually. I just thought this was something I needed to do by myself. Ever since I got out of the hospital on Friday all I've had is people baby me. Tell me I need to rest, and I should be taking it easy. Well I'm pretty sick of it. I feel fine, I'm not all that sore anymore and regardless of what people actually think, I want to go back to school. I thirst for education. I've said it once, I'm a nerd. Proud of it. But I'm seriously trying my hardest to figure out why I came by myself.

I parked in the very back of the senior parking lot farthest from the school as I could. I shut my car down and sat back breathing out softly. I glanced around the fairly busy parking lot and watched a few girls get out of the car in front of me and walk away, arms linked together. It made me wish I had offered to drive Camille and Sam. But I didn't and now I was here and now I have to go in and face the school by myself. I pushed my door open after taking off my seatbelt and slid out of my truck holding my back pack tight against my body. I slammed my door shut and locked it while holding my side. I was really just checking to make sure my wrap was still around me tight. Along with the bandage, I had to have the wrap on just in case my stiches started bleeding out. It felt all snug and tight, thanks to my mom and I walked around the back of my truck and instantly smiled. The first person I saw was Kendall. He was leaning up against the hood of his car with his sister on one side and Logan on the other. He was looking at me, smiling small. He waved at me softly and I blushed like crazy walking over to them quickly. Logan smiled bright at me while eating what looked like a blueberry muffin. I smiled back and saw Katie, in the corner of my eye, glare at her brother before picking up her bag off his car and clearing her throat. "I'll see you after school jerk. See ya Logan…bye Anna." I waved at her and smiled as she turned and walked away. I looked back to Kendall quick who shoved his hand sin his pockets and rolled his eyes shaking his head.

"Ignore her. She's just being a baby because she got caught with a loser of a guy in her bed by me and my dad." I raised my eyebrow slowly and he chuckled shaking his head again. "How are you feeling this morning?" I slowly walked next to him and gently leaned against his car like he was.

"I'm alright. Same as yesterday I guess." Kendall smiled small and nodded softly. We had already talked about this, this morning in our texts. He asked me one last time before got in the shower if I wanted a ride and I turned him down. I looked between Kendall and Logan who I noticed staring at each other. Logan elbowed Kendall softly who rolled his eyes and turned to me.

"My idiot friend wants you to ask Camille out for him." I turned to Logan and smiled tucking some loose hair behind my ear. Logan blushed and glared at his best friend before looking down eating his muffin still. "He's a chicken and you're her best friend."

"Which means I know her." They both looked up at me and I giggled shaking my head. "Logan she really likes you. She has for a while. I can promise you, if you ask her yourself, it will mean more to her. Trust me. Just be you, because that drives her crazy." He blushed even harder and wiped at the crumbs of muffin on his chin. I laughed and looked at Kendall who was smilgin down at me, with a weird look on his face. Like…happiness. Pure happiness. It made my heart burst.

"Alright I'm a chicken but…you haven't asked her yet so…there." Kendall looked at Logan fast who put his back pack on his shoulder and sighed. "I'm going to find James and Carlos. See you at lunch. See you in first period Anna." I smiled warmly at him but turned to Kendall fast. I grinned noticing his red cheeks and dimples poking out. He grabbed his back pack and laughed rubbing the back of his neck.

"Remember the first day I saw you in the hospital I asked you out?" I nodded and bit my tongue so I wouldn't scream out, in front of him, freaking him out. "Well I was wondering if you'd want to go to the movies with me on Friday night? And maybe go out to dinner? I know it's not ideal for a first date and it will probably be worse when I ask if it's alright if we double date with Logan and Camille, if he gets the balls to ask her, but I'm just trying to help him break out of his shell and…" I don't know what came over me. It might have been him really asking me out, for a real date. Or that he was rambling and he was nervous just doing it. But I got on my tippy toes, grabbed the sides of his face and kissed his lips hard, but not rough. He remained motionless. And when our lips actually pushed into each other, I was also forced to go completely still. The only boy I've ever kissed has been Ben. The only boy who has ever really touched me has been Ben. We weren't dating. But he liked to think we were sometimes. If we went anywhere, like the movies, or I went over to his house to study, one of his hands would end up on my body and he'd kiss me, trying to get more. He got a hand under my shirt once, and one up my leg but that was it. And for some reason kissing Kendall made me hate that I ever stopped Ben. I wasn't experienced at all. In anything really. I didn't know what to do. I didn't even know to really kiss. Thankfully Kendall did.

His hands were on my hips softly. He was holding me while pulling me into him. His lips parted a little and I felt a little dab at my own lips, by his tongue. My mouth parted just a little and right as his tongue slide in I heard the bell go off over head. His mouth was away from mine fast but we stayed holding onto each other. I never opened my eyes, not really remembering when I closed them. I swallowed hard trying to get a grip on reality when there was another kiss to my lips, this one a little more passionate. My knees were growing weak and my hands were falling from his face. If I had my way I would let go completely and let him catch me so we could float away to our secret place and he could continue what he was just about to do with his tongue. But we couldn't and we didn't continue what we were about to do because he pulled away brushing some hair off my face and laced our hands together. I finally opened my eyes as he started to pull me along and I stared up at the side of his face. He had that same smile on his face from earlier. Happiness. I probably mirrored his expression. "So…it's a date then?" He looked down at me laughing and nodded leaning in kissing my forehead. I was walking on the clouds.

The clouds, the birds chirping and the rainbows disappeared however, as soon as I got into the school and the noises and sights entered my brain. Even with Kendall's hand in mine and the taste of his lips still on mine I couldn't ignore the faces staring at me. I couldn't ignore the whispers as Kendall walked me down the hall gently squeezing my hand every now and then. Maybe he could sense I was uncomfortable. Maybe that's why everyone we passed, he just kept walking. I saw some people giving me sad pathetic smiles, while some looked at me like I had a bullet in between my eyes. Every step we took in a place I hardly recognized, I felt more and more out of place. No one looked at me like they used too. No one was looking down at me. Everyone was staring at me with pity written all over their face. It seemed to make me feel worse. "Are you alright?" I looked around and realized we were stopped in front of my 1st period class. I swallowed hard and squeezed tighter onto Kendall's hand, looking down.

"I'll be fine. It just…I guess it doesn't feel right. Nothing seems right anymore, ya know?" My hand was squeezed again and I sighed looking up. "You don't mind if I text you during class do you?" He laughed, leaned in and kissed my forehead gently. It was the sweetest thing anyone boy has ever done for me. Again my knees got weak and I wanted to run away with him, right at that moment.

"Of course." I smiled up at him and he sighed pushing his back pack up on his shoulder, higher. "I'll see you at lunch. I'll meet you at your locker." I nodded biting my bottom lip and regretfully let his hand go as he walked away. I groaned on the inside and turned slowly, walking into my English classroom. I thankfully spotted Logan in the back right corner and slowly made my way towards him. He smiled and pointed to the seat next to him and I grinned sitting down fast. I set my back pack on my desk and ignored the people whispering, probably about me as we all waited for class to start. I felt a lot more better when I saw Sam and Camille walk in, laughing to themselves. They spotted Logan and I and hurried to the two desks in front of us. Sam purposely took the one in front of me so Camille had to sit in front of Logan. Both of them smiled at each other but blushed and looked away trying to busy themselves. Sam turned completely around to me even though the teacher was walking to the front of the classroom.

"So…my dad is really freaking out about me being back in school and wants me to transfer schools." I frowned and leaned forward a taking a note book and pen out of my bag putting my back on the floor under my desk.

"He knows there isn't any more problems here. It was just a onetime thing, right?" She shrugged her shoulders taking my pen form me and immediately started drawing hearts on the cover of my green notebook. "Besides…what makes the next school safer?" She looked up fast just as the bell rang telling us class was staring and I smirked taking my pen from her poking her shoulder with it. She turned rolling her eyes. I looked up to the front to see Mr. Jacobs standing in the front of the room looking up at the clock on the wall and just as he opened his mouth, the intercom came on.

"_Attention students and Teachers. There is a mandatory assembly in the gym that will take up all of first period. Please teachers, have your students leave all their belongings in the classroom and file orderly into the gym. Thank you and welcome back everyone."_ My stomach twisted into knots knowing this assembly was going to be all about what happened two weeks ago, which meant it would come around to me because I was the only survivor who was shot. This wasn't going to be fun.

I walked quietly alongside Logan, Camille and Sam who were also very quiet. A lot of people walking to the gym, were very quiet. Surprisingly quiet, especially for this school. Whenever there was something, anything, that allowed us not to be in class, people freaked out. But everyone was…so somber now. It actually annoyed me. And it got worse when we got into the gym and walked over to the senior bleachers. I heard Logan say he saw Kendall, Carlos and James and led the three of us over to him. I first noticed how uncomfortable James and Kendall looked. They wouldn't even look at each other. Thankfully Carlos was between them, but when we got closer Carlos stood up and took Sam's hand helping her up the two rows of bleachers. Kendall also extended his hand to me, and I took it gratefully. I wanted to sit on his lap. Maybe crawl into his soul. Hide myself. But I didn't an di couldn't. I just sat next to him, close and let Camille sit on the other side of me, Logan getting next to her. I had people around me, who cared about me and were ready to make me feel safe but it wasn't enough. The gym I was in right now, wasn't what it used to be. It wasn't loud with rowdy teenagers. It wasn't happy, and it wasn't exciting. Things weren't the same and for once, I just wanted something to be said or done, that didn't concern the shooting. My head, my heart and my soul had moved on. Why had no one else? Why did we still need to linger on this?


	6. Chapter 6: This Kiss, Lip Gloss

"Knight?!" I looked up from my iPod and watched my coach walk towards me holding his famous clipboard. "We need to talk in my office." I sighed out quietly and got up from the bench in front of my locker. I was completely dressed, ready for practice and just wanted it to get over with. I wanted to go home. Well honestly I wanted to go with Anna to Starbucks so we could study. It was technically going to be our first date and I was antsy for it to happen. But I still had two hours of football practice to go through and knowing how this day has gone, this practice wasn't going to be about football. It was going to be about the shooting. My coach, much like the whole school, was going to talk to us about how if we needed to talk, they would be there. He was probably going to give us a big speech about how he heard half the football team was bullying kids. Or maybe he just was going to yell at us for not showing up to practice for the past two weeks. As far as I knew half the team hasn't been coming since the shooting, I was one of them, and so was James, but I preferred not to think about him. "Take a seat Kendall. This isn't going to take long." I sighed again, quietly so I wasn't heard and sat in the chair in front of his desk. He set his clipboard down, took off his ball cap and folded his hands on his desk, staring right at me. "Your dad gave me a call. He just wants me to make sure you're okay with coming to practice. Because if you're not we can put Ronnie in for you until you're ready to come back."

"I'm fine coach." He gave me an odd look before looking down and clearing his throat.

"Louisiana State, Georgia and UCLA are coming to the next game to look at you play." My mouth parted open slightly and I sat forward a little looking him square in the face. I had no idea this is where this conversation was going to be headed. I've been told I'm a good player but I didn't think it was Georgia or UCLA good. Hell even Louisiana State good. "They have some scouts coming out to watch you play, and maybe talk to you. Now…normally I don't do this because my players are not only my players, but a part of this family, and I don't like to pick guys out, one by one but I've watched you play since your pee wee days. You are incredible Kendall and a rare gift. If I were to give you any form of advice it would be to wait it out for something else to come around. These schools are great but you can do better, and I know you will do better." I sat back a little feeling a little…blessed I guess. I knew my coach was a good coach and sometimes he was a dick but I think he's always had our best interest at heart and I haven't realized it until now. If he told me to wait, I'll wait. "College ball is a totally different game compared to high school ball. I want you to go to the school that will use your skills and talent on the field, as much as it uses you in the classroom. I know you're not a dumb kid Kendall and I know you like to slack off because school can get boring, but I don't want your college choice to be based solely on your football skills. You are so much more than a jock." I smiled small and slowly stood myself up nodding.

"I'll give it some thought Coach." He smiled and stood up putting his hat back on and grabbing his clipboard. "To be honest I don't know where I want to go to school yet." He walked to me patting my padded shoulder and laughed.

"Kendall that is more than alright. You don't have to make a decision yet. If anything the only thing you should be worrying about is being a kid. Given the circumstances I mean…" He paused and for a moment I felt I could read his mind. Maybe he heard I had three guns pointed down in my face. Maybe by Carlos's dad who was an active supporter of our team. Maybe he was worried about my mental state. "I don't want something like what happened, to make this team and this school, grow up to fast. I've heard what you did for that girl in the library and I'm proud of you. But don't let that day, change your future. You can still be a teenager Kendall. Enjoy it, please." I nodded fast and walked out in front of him going back to my locker. Most of the guys were geared up and ready to go, but only a few were still putting their jersey's on. "Alright guys. I know some of you haven't been coming to practice the past two weeks and that's okay." I took my seat again next to Logan who was tying his shoes tight. Across form us in the row of lockers was James and Carlos, neither of which were looking at me. "I'm not going to punish you guys from not coming. Today were going to run some drills, run some plays and strategize about our game this Saturday. Just a heads up, I want to go to two a days starting Friday until the end of the season so make arraignments if you need to. Once you get out on the field get your liquid in and start stretching." We all started to stand up and talk to ourselves as we headed out, but I hung back a bit, waiting for Logan. James and Carlos started to walk by and James being behind Carlos, walked slower just to stop in front of me. I tensed up and even saw Logan stand up quick but James only shook his head.

"Whatever issue we have shouldn't reflect on the field." He turned quick and walked out after the rest of the team. I followed slowly, Logan right behind. We were the last to leave which gave Logan, of course, time to hound me.

"Is it really that bad that James dates your sister? I mean look at her option in this school. James is a guy you trust right? You guys have been friends for life. And it's going to all go down the drain because they kept it from you and your huge dad. I would too!" I glared at him as we walked out into the brisk air. "You and your dad are not easy to talk to about your sister. James…no Katie was probably the one to suggest it. If anything you should be pissed at her, and be giving him a very strict guideline of what is and what isn't okay. Like sleeping in her bed at 5 am. Or how late they can be out together. It's about trust Kendall and the fact that you don't trust either one of them, irritates me. I honestly do think if something were to happen, Katie would run right to you and let you deal with it. And I know James. He's an idiot, but he's not that stupid." I saw ahead of us James glance over his shoulder at Logan and frowned.

"Let me guess….idiot boy paid you to talk to me?" He stopped me fast grabbing my arm standing in front of me.

"No. He didn't. What's happening here, is Carlos and I don't want to be stuck in the middle of your bullshit fight. Get over it or don't. But don't expect us to be there, picking up the pieces. This is your own mess, and if you take a second to look around and realize how many people you are effecting by this you might reconsider. You can't shield her forever. And neither can your dad." He turned quick pulling his helmet on his head running to catch up with the rest of the team. In my free hand I cracked a few of my knuckles and started to walk again. When I got closer to the field, which was about 50 feet from our locker room, I spotted four people, girls, sitting on the bleachers. My stomach fluttered with butterflies seeing Anna, sitting in the middle of Sam and Katie, all smiles. Camille was on the other side of Katie waving, probably at Logan. When I got even closer, onto the grass, Anna spotted me and waved. I waved back smiling small and right beside Anna I saw my sister. She looked like a box of puppies was set ablaze in front of her. She looked destroyed. And then I saw where her line of vision was and saw James wasn't even looking at her. Maybe I did overact. Maybe…I was being a dick. I set my helmet on the ground by the group of loud talking players and ran over to the bleachers fast.

"Katie?" I stopped on the track separating the field form the stands and sighed out nodding her over. She rolled her eyes standing up and walked down to the high fence leaning on it.

"What?" She and ice in her tone that pissed me off, but I shook it off.

"Do you really like him?" She blushed instantly and stood up straight looking over my head. "I don't want to see you get hurt. I would have reacted the same way if it was any guy Katie. The fact that he's one of my best friends makes it a little worse. But…" She looked down at me fast and I shrugged my shoulders. "It's not my life. If you want to date him I give you my blessing or…whatever you need. I'll even talk to dad for you." A small smile spread across her face but I walked even closer craning my neck and squeezing my eyes to block you the sun. "But I swear to God Katie, the first time he does something wrong, I'm kicking the shit out of him." She lunged over the fence, still standing behind it and wrapped her arms around my neck. I sighed and smiled small hugging her quickly before letting her go and walking backwards. "Try to keep any PDA around me to a minimum, like none. Ever." She only nodded, not looking at me anymore. I turned and walked back to the group who was all drinking and stretching like we were told. I walked right up James who was smiling and talking with Carlos. I stood kind of between them making Carlos uneasy and cleared my throat, getting James attention. "My sister is my blood. Blood runs a hell of lot deeper than water. If you ever do anything to make one tear fall out of her eyes I will make you cry in the most sever of pain. You ever force her to do something she doesn't want you to do I will let my dad deal with you. Just know James dating my sister isn't going to be like all the other girls you've dated. You hurt her and break her heart our friendship is over and I will kill you." His mouth fell open slowly as we stared at each other. "I'm sorry for what I said to you in front of my house. I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt and hope to God you are changed because I do know what kind of guy you were. I know how you treated girls and I know what you did with those girls. Don't do it to Katie. You're one of my best friends and I don't want to lose you as a best friend." I breathed out hard and started to turn seeing Carlos and Logan staring at me but was stopped. James turned me softly, a smile on his face.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you. Your sister was 100% positive you and your dad would have killed me in your basement." I smiled back and patted his shoulder. But my smile fell fast.

"Don't hesitate to think we won't if you do something stupid." His smile also fell as I turned around and walked to my helmet. I heard Carlos call James an idiot, which made me smile and feel a little better about the situation. I just knew the easy part was over. Talking to my dad about this would be absolute hell.

Practice went by surprisingly fast. I guess I was feeling good because my sister didn't hate me anymore and neither did James. Even though I had been off the field for two weeks, it felt like I never stopped. I was honestly better than I have been in a while, Coach even said so. That made me feel great. And it helped that Anna was on the sidelines watching me. It gave me a great boost of confidence. But just like everything good in my life, it was ruined right at the very end. Just as we were walking off the field after a good hour and forty five minute practice and a 30 minute talk with the coach, the cheerleaders came out onto the field. And walking in the front, looking pretty and completely normal was Jo. We were going to walk past each other. She was probably going to stop me because she probably heard I moved on, just as fast as she did. I didn't want to deal with her right now, but as we walked off the field, giving it to the cheerleaders for their own practice, it looked like that was exactly what was going to happen. "Kendall…." I nodded to James and Logan who stopped when I did making both of them walk off still. Jo got right in front of me her arms crossed over her chest and waited until all the rest of the girls walked by. "Uhm…I tried to see you…after the…" She stopped and looked down kicking at the grass. "But your dad told me you were at the hospital. And then I tried again during the past two weeks and you were always at the hospital. I didn't want to call because I just knew you wouldn't answer so I just…"

"Jo." She looked up fast a smile on her face and I shook my head. "I don't want to see you anymore. We are done. I don't want to even be your friend." Her smile fell and her arms fell off her chest.

"Kendall I was worried about you. Isn't that allowed? I know we broke up…"

"No Jo. We are nothing anymore. The minute you fucked that guy at that party we were done. I don't want to even think about you let alone see you. So no I don't want you to be worried about me, and no it's not allowed. I don't give a shit what you're going through. I don't fucking care." I walked past her squeezing hard onto my helmet and ran one of my hands run through my sweaty hair.

"So that's it? I make a stupid mistake and your already with some nerd?!" I stopped fast and spun even faster. Her bag fell off her shoulder and hit the ground as she walked towards me. I ignored her smooth looking tan legs under her little skirt and tried to block out her flowery scent wafting into my nose. "For the record I was drunk at that party. He practically took advantage of me and you did nothing!"

"Cry me a fucking river Jo! I don't care what happened. You let another guy have sex with you. As if any thought of me was thrown out the window because you never fucking cared!" I turned again and started to walk away fast but stopped and turned back to her, keeping a safe distance between the two of us. "And for the record Jo…she's not a nerd! She's smart! And she's beautiful. She's funny and she actually likes to talk to me about more than stupid friends and stupid parties!" I turned back around and rushed off the field walking the distance to the locker room. I was mumbling to myself, pissed and furious. I didn't hear the running footsteps coming up behind me. Not until I was 5 feet away from the door that led inside the boys locker room, and someone was in front of me. It was Anna. She was a little breathless and had one hand on her wound but looked worried. Maybe she heard my fight with Jo. Maybe she didn't like it. "Anna…Jo and are done….I'm…" It was the second time in the day that this girl has grabbed my face and kissed me. Unlike the first time, she took control, forcing my mouth open sticking her tongue inside my mouth. I grabbed her sides and pushed her into the wall by the locker room door. Her arms wrapped around my neck and she stood on her tippy toes to get closer to my mouth. I didn't care that my helmet dropped from my hand and smashed into the ground. I also didn't care about the footsteps walking towards us. All I cared about was that I was making out with her, which is something I've wanted to do for a very long time. And I loved that she was the one to make the move. She wasn't hesitating with this kiss either. I don't think she noticed I was still a little sweaty. Maybe she just didn't care. It didn't stop our intense kiss. The only thing that stopped us was a throat being cleared ad door being shut. I pulled away first and blushed instantly starting at Logan, James and Carlos. I heard her sigh quietly as she pushed her face into my neck. I turned my head slightly and saw Camille, Sam and Katie all staring at us, smiling small. I blushed even harder and turned back to Anna pulling her face up to mine with one finger under her chin. I kissed her softly one last time before pulling away and laughing quietly. "Let me go get changed and we can go study." She only nodded wiping at her mouth looking down. I walked to the guys who were giving me ridiculous grins. As I walked past Carlos, who had the door open for me I heard him softly say,

"You got some lip gloss on your face dude."


	7. Chapter 7: Guts

"It's almost painful to watch." I squeezed around my pen softly watching as two people, who do really like each other, talked quietly. I gently started to bounce my left leg as I tried concentrating on my paper in front of me. But it was for not. I kept looking up from my work over at the bookcase and watching the scene unfold. Just as I bit on the inside of my right cheek I felt an arm slip around my back pulling me closer to the warm body next to me that smelled like Heaven. I loved his cologne. I loved his face. God…I loved everything about him. Especially how close, and cuddly we were getting. I don't know, after hearing a guy you really like defend you in front of his ex-girlfriend, really gets a girl a thinkin. Maybe he could be the one. And maybe I only think he's the one because his arm is around me and his lisp are pressed into my cheek and moving to my ear. I tensed up a little and set my pen down, glancing around the classroom hoping the teacher didn't see, and yell at us for being too close. But no one was really looking at us. No one was paying attention to his arm around my back, his lips on my skin or his other hand resting now, on my left leg. I was, but only because I was becoming a little hot. He gave one kiss to my ear before sighing softly and squeezing my thigh making me squirm and giggle like a small child.

"He's told me many times…Camille makes him nervous. He wanted you to ask her for him on Monday. I think something needs to be said for the fact that he's actually talking to her by himself four days later." I giggled again and turned my head just as he leaned in and kissed my lips softly. "Besides…" He pulled away after a small kiss but kept his hands on me. "You already got your math done…I'm lost. You don't have to watch if you help me. " I smiled small noticing the red blush on his cheeks and reached up fast with my hand and cupped his rosy cheek. He looked up from his worksheet and grinned at me. I leaned in fast, kissing him one last time before pushing his hands off me and scooting closer on my chair. I dragged his paper across the table in front of me and sighed softly seeing a lot of eraser marks and a lot of numbers that didn't really make sense.

"Okay…what's making you lost?"

"Well we could start by how distracting you are, right next to me." I rolled my eyes moving closer so I was almost sitting on his lap and picked up his pencil. "In coming…" I lifted my head fast and smiled big at Camille as she walked towards us a huge grin plastered to her face. One of Kendall's hands found its way on my back again and instead of pushing it away I gently sat back, snuggling under his arm, as Camille and Logan sat across from us, taking their original spots. I stayed quiet, along with Kendall as Logan set a book on the table and cleared his throat, blushing like crazy, and picked up his pen. Camille smiled small over at him before looking over at me and leaning forward on the table.

"So…what movie are we gonna see tonight?" I felt giddy, instantly and also leaned forward smiling at her. She looked happy. Like a kid on Christmas morning.

"Atta boy Loges." Logan flipped Kendall off casually with his head still down and pen moving fast over his paper. "My vote is for the scary one…Carrie. I saw the original, loved it, now I think we should see this one." I turned slowly to Kendall who was smiling at me. "Because then you have an excuse to cling onto me, if you get scared." I laughed, with an open mouth making him move in fast and kiss me. I put both hands on his face, and kissed with absolute passion and love.

"Or Logan and I can watch you two make out all night." There was a soft slam of a hand onto the table by my best friend making me jerk away and wipe my mouth. She glared at me before sitting back in her chair and sighed. "I think you guys are cute and all but the PDA is nauseating." I blushed seeing Logan look up between Kendall and I, and looked down quick going back to his math homework. "Oh goodie…bitch alert." That got my attention fast. I turned my head seeing that's where Camille's eyes were and glanced around Kendall's bigger body, his broad shoulders and tall frame a great door rather than a window. I first only saw James. He sat down at a table a few tables away from us not looking happy. And then I saw her. Jo. She took the seat right next to him, setting a huge Prada bag on the table turning to him fast. She started talking, too quiet for me to hear, but whatever she was saying wasn't something James was happy about. "What do you think that's about?" I breathed out softly and only shrugged. Kendall on the other hand turned back to the table shaking his head softly. I continued to stare at the two who were closer now, talking about God knows what. "Say the word Kendall…I'm like an attack dog."

"Thank you Camille but whatever it is, James can take care of himself. And if he can't you have my blessing." Kendall turned to me and set a hand on my knee but for once he couldn't distract me. Not after seeing all that I was seeing. I don't know why I haven't noticed it all week, maybe because it hasn't been there all week, but there was a very defined bruise on James's neck. And this didn't look like any kind of hickey bruise. This almost looked like a hand print. And like I noticed as he sat down, he didn't look happy. But he looked actually…kind of really sad. And weather I liked to admit it or not, Jo looked like she was comforting him, and he was happy about that. Something didn't seem right. "Hey…you okay?" I turned to look at Kendall and opened my mouth to ask him if James was oaky, but the bell rang overhead telling us, study hall was over, and school was finally out. I turned back to James and Jo, who were now standing up talking still. I got up fast and stared at them as they walked out. James held the door open for Jo, now smiling.

"Uhm…I'll be right back." I pushed my chair away and ignored Camille and Kendall's questions as I hurried out of the classroom. I looked down the right side of the hall before turning to the left and spotting Jo and James. James was now laughing, quietly in front of his locker with Jo right beside him. She finally got on her tip toes, kissed his cheek giving him a small hug and turned walking towards the doors to leave the building. I pushed my way through kids and hurried to James just as he closed his locker and locked it again. "James?" He turned to me and looked down smiling small.

"Hey Anna!" He smiled big turning towards me fast but it fell when I moved my hand up and touched his neck. He backed away almost instantly and bowed his head down. "I need to get to practice…"

"James." He looked up again this time almost looking on the verge of tears. "Who did that to you?" He blinked a couple times before looking over my head and swallowing hard.

"I'll talk to you later." He spun fast and made his way to the exit. I wanted to follow him, but three people got in front of me, blocking me of James completely. Kendall looked a little worried as he put a hand on my shoulder with my bag in his other hand.

"What's wrong?" I swallowed hard shaking my head and gently took my bag form him.

"Nothing. I was just…making sure Jo wasn't harassing James." He only nodded and I gave a reassuring smile, standing on my tip toes. "Be careful in practice. Don't get to banged up." I kissed his lisp softly putting both hands on his sweater holding it softly. When I pulled away, he was smiling, but he still looked worried, maybe even confused. "Are we going to get dinner before or…"

"You're going to get spoiled tonight…don't worry about where or what…we'll be by around 7." I only smirked as I nodded and he put his hands around my back. He moved into kiss me again but something caught both of our attention. Logan and Camille were leaning against the wall across form us, rather close to each other. But it was Camille, leaning in, kissing Logan softly that made both of us look. I made a little awe come out and Kendall chuckled nuzzling his face into my neck. "We're gonna pick you up first, and then Camille, because you know where she lives." I only nodded wrapping my arms around his neck letting him pepper kisses to me while I still watched Logan and Camille. "Do you have a curfew?"

"Not when there's no school the next day. Why? We gonna party all night?" I laughed, but he wasn't.

"Actually…James's dad is out of town this week and has invited us all over tonight just to hang out. We could go after the movies, or I could just take you home. Your call." Going to James's house seemed like the perfect opportunity to hound him about the bruise so I turned making Kendall face me and nodded.

"Sounds like fun." He smiled leaning in again and kissed me one last time before letting me go and backing away. "I'll see ya tonight." He smirked nodding and grabbed Logan's backpack as he continued to walk backwards. Logan groaned and shoved him off, which made both of them run after each other, shoving and being typical guys. I chuckled and let my arm get tangled with another arm, and let Camille lead me out. "Gross PDA."

"Oh shut up. At least I don't let him feel my legs up and suck on my neck in class." I tried to look insulted but she shrugged it off smiling big. "His lips are absolutely…perfect. SO soft, so talented…God I can't believe I waited this long to kiss that boy. If he is as good in bed as he is a kisser, he might get the V card."

"Camille!" I looked at her horrified but she again laughed it off walking us outside to our cars. "Ya know…since you bring it up…I mean…when do you think it is okay to lose your virginity?" She groaned and stopped by my truck letting my arm go.

"Honey…sweetie…baby doll…in this day in age, when we have TV shows about 16 and pregnant and Teen mom…I don't think there are any more rules. You don't have to wait tell marriage, and you don't have to be in love. Fuck Kendall if you want to. I know your probably in love already but there isn't a certain time limit or anything. Just don't over think it alright. Like tonight…when were at James's house…if you two end up in a bedroom by yourselves and that headboard starts knocking on the wall, we won't judge. In fact we'll encourage it as long as you use protection." I groaned and gently hit my head against my door. "Do you know if he's a virgin?" I turned fast and glared at her, blushing. This was the last thing I needed anyone hearing about at this school. The last thing I wanted people to see me as is a slut.

"I know he's not." Both Camille and I turned, very fast to see the person who was now talking to us, standing very close. Jo. I swallowed hard and started at her up and down. She was tall, blonde and beautiful. She had legs for days, a perfect body shape, with bigish boobs, and curvy hips. No wonder I had self-esteem issues. I was too thin, no chest, no hips and no butt. But Kendall was certain I was the most beautiful girl in the world. He's said it many times any chance he got. And I am starting to believe him. "Can we talk in private Anna?" I swallowed hard turning to Camille and gently shoved her arm. Camille glared at Jo before walking away giving me a look that suggested if anything went down, to call her. Yes, if I got in a chick fight with Jo Taylor, the first person I would call would be Camille. "We haven't ever really talked in the 6 years we've gone to the same schools and…I guess after the shooting, I was regretting that." I crossed my arms over my chest and tried to stand taller than her, failing at doing so. "I've never meant to be super bitchy. I'm not a mean person, I just never thought you were the type of person I would want to hang out. I mean…no offense or anything but we don't have a lot in common. And my friends can be assholes so…" She stopped and took a small step towards me. "My point is…I may not know you. And you don't know me, but we have some common ground to stand on. We both have been swept off our feet by Kendall Knight." My arms dropped form my chest and my mouth parted open. "I know him Anna. He seems sweet now, and he's treating you like a delicate flower but it can't last forever and it won't. He'll want something from you. Something huge and valuable. If you don't give it up, he will leave you, and try to find it somewhere else, while making you feel guilty." She got just a little closer, so I had to crane my neck just to maintain eye contact. "He's not a good guy Anna. I'm just looking out for you. Girlfriend to girlfriend." She gave a nice pretty smile that probably would have worked on many other people, but not me.

"Do you know my last name Jo?" Her smile fell and she stepped back. I shook my head and turned putting the key in my door, unlocking my truck. "He told me what happened…that you cheated." I put my bag in the truck and turned to her one last time before getting in. "A lot of people follow you and listen to every word you say because your beautiful. But I'm not that naïve or stupid. Don't waste your breath Jo. Seriously…you couldn't say one thing to me that would make me not want to be with Kendall." I climbed in my truck fast seeing her smile in the corner of my eye. I slammed my door shut hard and slid the key into the ignition watching her walk away. I waited to drive out of the parking lot until I saw her go up to a group of her friends and start talking and laughing. She turned and looked back at me, laughing big and loud. I gripped my steering wheel, putting the truck in reverse and called her every name in the book. If only I had enough guts to run her over with my truck…


End file.
